Love, attraction, money, family—and the cultural expectations foreigners often miss
I did not move to Colombia in 2013 planning to write about dating.
I came looking for a different life.
Along the way, I fell in love, made mistakes, started a family, ended relationships, rebuilt myself, and learned that attraction is usually the easy part.
The more difficult part is understanding what the other person believes a relationship is supposed to be.
Dating in Colombia can feel warm, direct, affectionate, and intensely romantic. It can also become confusing when two people have very different expectations about money, exclusivity, family, gender roles, immigration, and what commitment actually means.
Colombia is not one uniform dating culture. People in Medellín, Bogotá, Pereira, Manizales, Cartagena, and smaller towns may approach relationships differently. Age, class, education, family background, religion, and previous exposure to foreigners also matter.
This page is not a pickup guide.
It is not written to convince you that Colombian men or women are inherently better—or worse—than anyone else.
It is a collection of candid stories and practical observations for readers who want to date here without losing their judgment, their savings, or themselves.
Start Here
Why Do Men Still Go to Colombia? Exploring the Motivations and Realities
Romance is part of Colombia’s international appeal, but it is rarely the entire explanation. This article looks at why foreign men continue traveling here, including attraction, affordability, lifestyle, curiosity, and the search for relationships that feel different from those available at home.
5 Colombian Dating Red Flags That Scream Scam or Unnecessary Drama
Rapid declarations of love, repeated financial emergencies, hidden partners, inconsistent communication, and resistance to introducing you to family can all signal larger problems. This is one of my more personal and intentionally blunt, articles.
How to Understand Relationships Versus Sex in Colombia
Affection, sexual chemistry, and frequent communication can create a sense of intimacy before either person has clearly defined the relationship. This article examines the gap between attraction and commitment.
Are Colombians Capable of Love?
The provocative title grew from a painful personal question: why can a relationship that begins with so much warmth and emotional intensity become unstable once the honeymoon period ends? This essay explores disappointment, idealization, and the danger of turning one relationship into a judgment about an entire culture.
Find Love in Colombia: Four Places to Meet People More Naturally
Dating apps are not the only option. Dance classes, gyms, coffee shops, cultural venues, and repeated participation in local activities can create better opportunities to meet people gradually and observe how they behave over time.
What Foreigners Often Misunderstand
A Colombian calling you mi amor does not necessarily mean they have decided to build a life with you.
Warmth is part of everyday communication here. Affectionate language can be sincere without representing exclusivity or long-term commitment.
Money can also enter the relationship earlier than many North Americans or Europeans expect.
One person may see paying for dinner, transportation, beauty appointments, family needs, or an occasional emergency as a normal expression of generosity. The other may interpret the same request as evidence that the relationship is transactional.
Neither assumption should remain unspoken.
Family is another major factor. A relationship in Colombia may involve parents, siblings, children, former partners, and extended family much sooner than expected. Being introduced to the family can be meaningful, but it is not automatic proof that everything you have been told is true.
The same applies to exclusivity.
Do not assume that frequent messages, sex, weekend trips, or affectionate introductions mean you are in a committed relationship. Ask directly. Pay attention to whether behavior matches the answer.
Chemistry Is Not Due Diligence
Cross-cultural dating requires openness, but openness should not mean abandoning common sense.
Take enough time to observe:
- whether stories remain consistent;
- how the person handles disappointment;
- whether affection changes when money is unavailable;
- whether you are included in their real life;
- how they speak about former partners;
- whether they respect reasonable boundaries;
- whether their interest survives outside vacations, nightlife, and romantic settings.
A beautiful evening can be real without being evidence of a sustainable relationship.
Let the experience be enjoyable.
Just do not build an entire future around the first few weeks.
Passport to Passion
How to Navigate Love, Dating & Good Living in Colombia
Passport to Passion grew out of more than a decade of living, dating, observing, and rebuilding my life in Colombia.
It is not a manual for “getting” a Colombian partner.
It is a guide for people who want to recognize cultural differences, ask better questions, and understand what may be happening beneath the surface of an exciting relationship.
Inside, I explore:
- attraction versus commitment;
- dating and exclusivity;
- financial expectations;
- family involvement;
- communication across cultures;
- warning signs and hidden motives;
- friendship and social integration;
- regional and class differences;
- the mistakes foreigners make when fantasy replaces observation;
- what difficult relationships can teach us about boundaries and self-respect.
Who Is the Book For?
The book may be useful if you are:
- dating someone from Colombia;
- planning to meet an online romantic interest;
- considering dating during a trip;
- involved in a long-distance relationship;
- confused about money, commitment, or family expectations;
- trying to recover from a difficult cross-cultural relationship;
- interested in Colombian culture beyond the familiar stereotypes.
About Erin
I’m Erin Donaldson, an American writer and long-term foreign resident who has lived in Colombia since 2013.
Through OpenMindedTraveler, I write candidly about dating, relationships, travel, cultural adaptation, and the realities of building a life abroad.
My work is grounded in firsthand experience, but no single relationship can represent an entire country. These articles offer perspective—not guarantees—and readers should always use their own judgment.
Questions about the book, media inquiries, and relevant collaboration requests can be sent to: